What a difference from the first time I was there & I couldn’t gently pedal the stationary bike for one minute without stopping to put my head down to prevent myself from blacking out! I’m sure glad Dr. Hedayat was able to discover the root causes of  my ‘mystery fatigue’ & help me with this & my fibromyalgia.

I didn’t realize at first how much these health issues were preventing me from exercising–which is a crucial part of pain management for me (with fibromyalgia, three broken lumbar vertebrae, & scoliosis).  It also felt great to see my slimmer, more athletic shape in all those mirrors today!  Feeling great is the best reward but it’s nice to have the little ego-boos along the way too!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Actually, I think my post from Thanksgiving says it all: http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/for-this-i-am-truly-thankful/

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had no idea when I began this journey how my life would be forever changed by this experience. As I’ve said before, I hope that you take away some tidbits that are helpful to you in your life–hopefully from all of us who were part of this Challenge.

I do hope you’ve found my journey especially inspirational, so I’ll leave you with some early posts when I was struggling with motivation & trying to establish new habits.

May you and your loved ones have a peaceful, prosperous, happy and healthy New Year!

~~Dawn

~~~~~~~~~~~~

My poor health had a major impact on my ability to interact with my family: http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/reality-bites/

Beginning my coordinated health plan at Renew: http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/yay-progress-d/

My 51st Birthday, and my test results which have profoundly effected my outlook: http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/life-the-universe-everything-or-i-want-another-50-years-please/

Setting tough priorities for health & time management: http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/workin-it/ http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/yikes-where-does-the-time-go/

Learning to adjust my thinking for healthy living & stress management: http://10newsblogs.com/halfyeardawn/2009/finding-the-one-who-is-not-busy/

But as I said, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about food this year.  And as I’m typing all these yummy things, I do say yummmmm, but not really a whole-heartedly as I’ve done for all these years past.  Strange?  Yes!!  But true none the less.  I recognize that I want the same flavors, the same feelings of special indulgence, the just-a-little-guilt-’cause-it’s-only-once-a-year enjoyment of that sinfully rich dessert, or nibbling all afternoon on a deliciously rich cheese, nut, & fruit plate while sipping a delicious shirraz or merlot.  But I’ve learned a lot over the last 4-1/2 months & I can’t go back to what was, even if I actually wanted to.

Now, I’m totally addicted to feeling good!!  That’s what it really comes down to. Right now I’m able to have teeny amounts of refined sugars or grains (we’re talking teeny-nibble size here) & about 1/2 cup of brown rice or quinoa 2 or 3 times per week, but much more than that & my body isn’t yet sturdy enough to process these without several days of feeling tired, sluggish, mentally foggy, & basically just yucky.  I don’t feel sick, per se, just not ‘well’.  And I’m really enjoying feeling well!  So I’m thinking how I can literally have my cake (or reasonably facsimile thereof) & eat it too!

I’ve already been planning my Thanksgiving dinner, knowing that I’ll actually have very little input as to the food since we’re blending four different family traditions this year & all of them will have a super-abundance of foods that I will want to eat on one level, but will not eat in actuality because I’m just plain selfish & want to keep feeling good!  (I’ll be extremely tactful & polite but if it comes down to bruising anyone’s feelings by not eating their specialties, so be it.)  So I’m deciding which foods I can eat without worry & how I’ll create a new tradition & make my other necessary ‘comfort flavors’ in delicious but healthy ways.

Number One: I must make pies!! This isn’t just for my feasting enjoyment, I’m the designated pie-baker & I truly love making the pies for my extended family & friends.  So I will make pies!  But I’ll make a special pumpkin pie just for me (& then I’ll have my delicious post-Thanksgiving breakfast right at hand as well!).  I’ve already decided I can make my traditional filling with only one change–no refined sugar or molasses.  So I’m making an experimental pie this week (no, I am not just making this pie so I can have two to pig out on–don’t be rude!)   < snarf, mumble, gulp >  I’ll use Agave Nectar instead, maybe with some maple flavoring, & I figure if I use an extra egg not only will it up my protein/carb ratio but it should help the filling  set well since I’m changing the liquid/dry ingredients ratio.  (If you have experience with this sort of thing, please tell me!)  Then I’ll make a crumb crust instead of flaky pastry & use finely chopped pecans, ginger, some Agave Nectar, & coconut oil–hopefully it’ll hold together.  If not, it’s been suggested I use dates to make the crust more sticky, but I’m going to wait & see how my test pie comes out first.  I’ll keep you posted!

Number Two: There must be cranberry relish! To me, turkey isn’t turkey without it!  So I’ll make my usual fresh cranberry & orange relish but instead of sugar I’ll use concentrated orange juice, maybe add a few raspberries, & use Pomona’s Pectin to make it set up nicely.  If I feel I still need some sweetener I’ll use my alternate, a Xylitol/Stevia combo I like, since I never have liked artificial sweeteners & don’t use them.

Number Three: There must be yams, and stuffing! Instead of my yummy yams with pineapple, brown sugar, nutmeg, & orange, I’m opting for a nice yam baked in it’s own skin until it’s nice & caramelized.  I really like these anyway so I’m choosing this & hopefully I can have a small scoop of stuffing without tipping myself over into several days of yukkiness.

So, with my must-haves taken care of I’ll have plenty of turkey, some gravy, skip the mashed potatoes (yeah, I know but they’re not as high on my priority list), & have all the vegetables I want that aren’t covered in wheat/corn/msg laced sauces.  We all love roasted brussel sprouts so if nothing else I can pig out on those too.  (I know, but even those of us who hate ‘em like brussel sprouts tossed in olive oil, salt, & pepper, & roasted until crispy outside & tender inside.  They taste nutty & sweet!)  I’ll  have lots of my delicious teas that I’ll bring & share with whoever might want some & I’ll forgo the alcohol, or have decaf if it’s made.  I can nibble on fresh veggies, nuts (not too many), & cheese, & have a very nice meal that will actually leave me completely satisfied & not feeling deprived.  (OK, maybe just a little when I smell all the sugary pies I’ll be making, but only a little.  That’s when the cherry pie Larabars come in handy!)

And I must report that today I had a test-run when I went to a Ladies’ Tea fundraiser for the Breast Cancer 3-Day.  I was somewhat tempted by all the luscious-smelling goodies but ate only smoked sausage, salad, tea, & half a cherry-pie Larabar.  Yay for me!  Just having something sweet that’s good for me is really a help.  Larabar makes some chocolate varieties that are awesome too! Yum!!  The sugary goodies do tempt but not really that strongly since my reason for holding back is wanting continued & increasing good health.  More & more I look at these foods with diminished enthusiasm.  Strange.  I wonder if this will continue?

I’m finding that 2-3 days a week of ‘stickwalking’ with my Exerstrider walking poles plus 2-3 days of interval training on my stationary bike has put my endurance level back up into my low-normal range of fitness!!  Yay!!  No more almost-blacking-out when doing aerobic exercise for me! And last week Dr. Kevin really worked to release more tight muscles in my lower back & hips, then Adam really kicked my behind with lots of lateral core work to really engage my obliques.  Coupled with an awsome adjustment from Dr. Buchel I was feeling better than I have in a long time.  My muscles were stiff the next few days, but not overly painful.  This really enforced my feeling of correct posture & core engagement from my lower abs–all good stuff.

I think I’ve really found a combination of exercises, chiropractic, & meditation/relaxation at home that’s beginning to show results!!  Today I got another adjustment & another kick-buns workout, plus I took an easy stick walk to help settle in my new muscular alignment after my body work.  Now I’ll see how this works out for me over the next week–I really feel I’m on th something!

Part of this new feeling of health, I believe, is I’m being very conscious of eating my prescribed meals & healthy snacks on more of a schedule–I think I was right in that I really can’t wait to eat until I get hungry because my energy level falls too low & I never really regain it that day.  So the ‘scheduling’ thing seems to be working pretty well.  (And I’ve lost almost 10 pounds!)

Dr. Hedayat ordered the blood panels for my Endobiogenic testing & I have a follow up appointment in 2 weeks so it will be interesting to see what the results show.  I’m very aware that my newly-found feelings of mental clarity, less muscle & joint pain, & greater energy are just beginning, & so are still quite fragile.  I will  have to be quite vigilant of my daily structure & actions–to continue to protect myself from myself –& not delude myself that I’m instantly better & can now go back to my old, destructive habits.  I’m in this for the long haul!!  I want to treat the root causes of my health issues, not merely trim a few symptoms here & there, so I’m very interested in what the test results will show & what my next steps are.

But I think the greatest impact my higher, more consistent energy level is having is on my physical therapy/pain relief conditioning. Now (2-3 days per week) I’m able to ride the stationary bike for 45 minutes, throw in some intense interval training (e.g., 30 seconds as fast as I can possibly go, then 45 seconds slow for rest, 30 sec on/45 sec off for 3  or 4 sets) & still not be dizzy when I finish!! (But of course I’m sweating like crazy!)  I’m finding it easier to do the core-strength building exercises & have begun to do some gentle yoga moves along with my prescribed exercises.  And I’m using some of those specific exercises as pain-relievers when my back hurts so I’m still not popping pain pills!! Sure I still hurt–sometimes quite a lot– but I’m working hard to retrain myself to use the exercises as my first-line of defense.  And you know what?  They’re helping me to have less pain in the long run!  < DUH!! >  I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to find exercises that really work!  (Or to learn to use them as ‘medicine’ instead of just part of physical conditioning.)

My biggest challenge this week has been really painful sciatica.  Dr. Buchel has been giving me really great chiropractic adjustments & Dr. Vanessa (& Dr. Kevin) have been doing lots of mobilization & mucle therapies on my hips & low back–including my favorite, the cold laser!–so between the adjustments & the soft-tissue thaerapies I’ve felt tremendous relief!  (I’m actually sitting here typing & only have a minimal amount of pain instead of it being torture, or not doing computer work at all!)   Dr. Vanessa even had me out this week waling around the block with these crazy walking poles (they’re sort of like cross-country ski poles) that totally kicked my butt, or should I say abs & core body!!  Then I got to ‘play’ (read: sweat!) on the Wii Fit doing soccer, cross-country skiing, hula-hooping (go ahead & laugh–I dare you to do it too!), & yoga.  Normally I would have taken a week to recover but I actually felt more of a normal tiredness & just slept for about 12-1/2 hours that night & felt a good energy in the morning!

I really feel like the co-ordination of the different therapies, diet, & medicines are beginning to show their synergistic effect. And Jonathon has been giving me awesome acupuncture sessions that not only help my sciatica, but even more importantly, have the effect of bringing everything together. No, that’s not a very good description.  More like, confirming the placement of and & ‘comforting’ the newly re-aligned parts of my body–physically, functionally, & mentally.  I feel like the acupuncture helps in re-integrating the disparate parts of my being that have been long divorced,  & in the reconnection of  normal function & communication. Or I can just say it makes me feel terriffic & leave it at that.   ;-D

So I pry myself away from the computer where I’ve been stuck with bills, business, & other boring stuff & get ready to cook myself a nice veggie omlette.  But just then my 8yr old comes powering into the kitchen & wants to make me a healthy breakfast because he knows I’ve been working hard.  His idea is to make me a power smoothie so he puts non-fat vanilla yogurt, unsweetened cocoa, & a dab of milk into the blender.  I also put in a few teaspoons of fermented soy powder to add some extra protein, and 2 bananas.  Tasted pretty good & I drank about 2 cups, but again no energy in a couple of hours.

This time I’m dizzy, foggy-minded, & exhausted.  My body is really showing me what it likes & when I don’t listen, it whacks me down hard. So I finally sat down & ate three hard-boiled eggs, a giant handful of cherry tomatoes, & small handful of baby carrots.  Sat down in the recliner & took a nap when I was done eating.  Better . . .but still not that good. I managed to get through the rest of the day with some nuts, a banana, & yogurt with blueberries,  plus I’m finishing another ‘super salad’ as I blog (again, see previous post).  Unfortunately by the time I finished cooking the chicken/prepping the veggies, my left leg was so numb I had trouble walking to the computer–standing really gets to me right now.

Now don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy a good meal–honest!!  Just watch me at Thanksgiving, or when I get the baking bug.   But most of my life I’ve thought of food as merely fuel (I’m not a picky eater), or as a reward/energy boost.  I’m so used to trying to ignore back pain that other body signals like hunger are sometimes something I just don’t notice until it gets critical.  (My friends are falling down laughing right now!  I’m known to walk into a store so hungry that I’ll aimlessly walk up & down the aisles like a zombie, almost unable to choose something to eat.  Crazy, huh?)

So I definitely learned (or re-learned) three very important things today:

• Eat proper meals with meat or eggs–yogurt doesn’t do the trick
• Eat breakfast within 1/2 hour of waking
• When I’m so exhausted/fuzzy, I’m not using my muscles to support my back–Ouch!

This time the knowledge is coming to me at a time when I’m putting it into proper context.  I’m really beginning to understand how this pattern of making food a time-waster in my mind has caused me to develop some very unhealthy eating habits–even though the foods I eat are, in and of themselves, generally pretty healthy.  Well, tomorrow is another day!

I was able to do almost three hours of work around the house & garden, being careful not to over-work my back (a past pattern of mine).  Around lunchtime I did have another ‘I’m so tired I’m passing out’ episode & I took a 2-1/2 hour nap,  but then I was up again & felt ready to go do more!  This is definitely progress.

I think the biggest change I’ve noticed over the past few days is that I’ve been hardly drinking any coffee or tea!  (Those of you who know me can pick your jaws up off the floor now.)  I’m usually the gal with a big mug in my hand most of the day–it’s the only way I’ve been able to keep myself on my feet & reasonably clear-headed.  But now I feel a more natural, ‘calmer’ sort of energy, if that makes any sense.  Today I never drank even one cup of green tea and I didn’t  notice until dinnertime!  This is amazing! I’m not having physical cravings for carbs either, just more of a  reflex kind.  I trimmed the the crusts off my son’s sandwich & almost ate them–but instead our dog Jay Jay performed the time honored role of clean up crew.  Whew!

First, I had recommendations last week from Jonathon Dodds, L.Ac on eating lots of red foods to boost my intake of fresh antioxidants and other natural nutritional factors, along with changing my iron supplement.  I immediately did both that afternoon and this week I’ve already felt some difference in my energy level and was able to reduce both the allergy and antacid medications I’m taking. Yay!!  Thanks Jonathan!

I also had a meeting last Saturday with Tina Mears, MFT on the obstacles standing in my way of meeting my goals & how to overcome them.  She helped me strengthen my resolve to put time for myself at the top of my daily to-do list. As a wife, mother, educator, and back-up for my husband’s business I end up at the bottom of my list unless I hold my ground and insist on time to do my exercises & prepare healthy meals (sometimes two–one for me & one for them), as well as time for my various treatments at Renew.  I had already begun to carve time for myself but Tina really reinforced how necessary this is for my health–and the health of my family.

Then on Monday and Tuesday I attended two seminars at Renew: One given by Dr. Kamyar M. Hedayat, M.D. on the biological (endocrine) interactions between my mood, the foods I eat, and how these profoundly effect my overall health; The other, given by  Dr. Robert Buchel, D.C. was on the importance of ridding my body of accumulated toxins from my years of over-the-counter pain medications (which I take in high doses), various prescription drugs, and (like Dr. Hedayat’s lecture) the constant cravings for sugar and simple carbs (read: pastry, cakes, bread, chocolate).

These seminars really helped me understand the chains of  biological reactions that are happening within my body and gave me tremendous encouragement! Now I understand why I’ve been feeling such profound exhaustion, light-headedness, fuzzy thinking, and muscle/joint pain.  But even more importantly, this knowledge has expanded my understanding of the interactions between my liver, pancreas, gall bladder, digestive system, brain/mood, hormonal/chemical reactions that drive and serve these structures & their individual processes, & much more.   And this knowledge is extremely helpful in my understanding the approach of the doctors here at Renew.   (I guess I need to understand the scientific basis for everything–even treatments like acupuncture have scientific language that can be accurately applied.)

So, I began my physical therapy Wednesday with Dr. Vanessa Jackson, D.P.T and Adam in the PT suite & boy, did they get my body moving!  Not to say I was running & sweating–they were working hard to unlock my stiff muscles & joints, work on my posture, & go through a stretching & limbering routine for me to do daily at home.  I’m sure glad they have this awesome whirlpool table (trough-shaped table filled with a warm ‘waterbed’ that has whirlpool jets pulsing underneath)–aahh!  Pure heaven for the stiff body!  All this helped me tremendously.

Wednesday I also had my second chiropractic adjustment with Dr. Buchel and he really worked, adjusting my joints from the base of my skull all the way down to my feet!  My spine, shoulders, elbows, wrists, hands, pelvis, hips, knees, & ankles were checked & adjusted if needed.  Now I was walking much better, although my body wasn’t quite sure what to do!  I actually had to be conscious of my movements as my normal pattern of walking had changed & if I wasn’t careful I felt I might stagger sideways.  Fortunately, my body acclimated quickly & the awkwardness passed in a few minutes.

Finally on Wednesday, I had a full history & examination with Dr. Hedayat. When finished I was so gratified & relieved when he explained that many of the destructive cycles he had spoken of (in his seminar on Monday) were ongoing in my body & causing much of my ill-health.  After being told my HMO they couldn’t find what was wrong with me & I would ‘just have to live with it’, I was excited to have an actual diagnosis & to start a course of action to begin healing!  The most important thing Dr. Hedayat told me was I need to rest my liver, gall bladder, & pancreas right now.

So for the next month or so I will avoid all starchy carbs like pastry, bread, potatoes, rice, pasta, & sugar.  (Waa!  Bye-bye chocolate!)  Along with the dietary changes recommended by Jonathan & a few detoxifying supplements, I will eat animal protein with each meal, have lots of vegetables, & before I eat any fruit I will eat 3-4 almonds or walnuts to aid the digestive process.  I will also snack on whole eggs (I like hard-boiled) & of course, drink plenty of water.  I will miss my bread & rice especially but I can do this for a month, or even two if needed.  I understand why I need to do this so I’m not seriously tempted cheat. (But I’ll be glad when I can have some Arroz con Pollo or fresh, whole-grain bread again!)

Then on Thursday I was able to get up in the morning and actually stand up straight & walk without shuffling about!  I look in the mirrior–GASP! My shoulders are back, my pelvis tilted correctly–I look like I just lost 10 pounds overnight!  Thanks Dr. Vanessa, Adam, & Dr. B!!

I’m so grateful–and motivated!!  I’ve never before had all these issues brought together by one person, or group of people working together. Now, having concrete knowledge and a plan for action is the key to my new-found determination.  Before, I was always aware that each practitioner was separate and many times their individual recommendations were incompatible in varying degrees.  The lack of coordination between each modality left me with many doubts.  I would have difficulty trying to pick and choose what parts of which programs to do, and my guesswork was never very useful or satisfying.  Now I have a terrific group of people who are extremely well-trained, have a wealth of experience in their fields, and truly want me to succeed.  Their good humor & grace has already shone through & I know they will be of tremendous help when I hit those stumbling blocks, as surely I will.

Unfortunately, on Thursday I was exhausted all day after my action-packed Wednesday (including 1-1/2 hour traffic each way!).  Then, as I was feeling better, I  had some sort of stomach/digestive crisis that night.  Whether it was food poisoning, a 6 hour flu, or the grocery store rotisserie chicken was too greasy, I don’t know.  But I ended up on the floor for 3-4 hours with pains in my right side like I’ve never felt before.  After ridding myself of that which offended my body, the pain slowly subsided & I was finally able to go to bed about 3 am.

Friday I had to cancel teaching workshops after being up all night but I finally felt well enough to head down to Renew again where Jonathan gave me acupuncture which really helped soothe & calm the last feelings of pain & nausea.  Then Dr. Buchel gave me another comprehensive chiropractic adjustment after a soothing heat treatment.  Then, some gentle stretching on the traction table & I felt pretty good!  (I did cancel my Physical Therapy session though.)  But I headed over to The Broken Yolk & had a terrific 4-egg omelet with tons of veggies & herbal tea (no honey!).  I did look wistfully at the yummy blueberry muffin, but I was good & took it home for my son.  Then I came home & slept like the proverbial log all afternoon, night,  & late this morning (Saturday, I’m just up really late–yikes! It’s 12:59 am on Sunday morning!)

But I do feel much better today.  My muscles are a bit sore but nothing major.  My right side is still tender inside, but I’m fine with eating from my approved list.  I’m standing straighter & I did some stretches; tomorrow I’ll do my full PT routine of assigned stretches & limbering exercises.   Boy, it feels great to start feeling good again!!  Thanks everyone at Renew!

I just wanted to do a simple thing, take my 8yr old son Rory to the beach. People do this all the time, right? I used to take him any time, & pull a wagon full of kids, toys & a cooler too!  But late yesterday afternoon I packed as light as I could & off we went to the beach, knowing I wasn’t up to carrying such things right now.  So I took a small water bottle, two towels, & tied my spare car key into my shorts.  Rory carried his bag of snorkeling gear & off we went.

We had parked about 4 blocks from the water & much of the way we walked over tidal mud flats.  While he ran around as only 8 year olds can I limped along, struggling to maintain a steady pace behind.  Each step began to hurt from my heels to my shoulder blades, with the pain steadily increasing until it was all I could do not to cry out.  When we finally got to a good spot I was grateful to sink down on the sand to watch him play.  While he tried to entice me to come play in the waves I just sat on the beach & tried not to sob with pain & frustration.  Here I sat, a stong woman who went through 30 hours of natural childbirth, reduced to tears by a walk at the beach. I wanted to run & swim with Rory but he knew I wasn’t up to it so he played games & clowned about to try to make me laugh.  He’s such a good kid!  So I sat there & choked back tears & yelled encouragements to him until the sun went down.  Then we wrapped up in the towels & packed up for the (dreaded) walk back.

By now I was hurting so much I was literally in survival mode. As I limped more & more, putting on foot in front of the other, I couldn’t allow myself to think about how far away from the car we were.  Rory knew I was feeling bad & he was pretty quiet as we went along.  The pain increased past anything I’ve felt while walking before, & then added in burning fire shooting up both legs just for good measure.   I was so exhausted I was literally staggering.  I thanked God with all my heart when we finally made it to the car.

When we got home I took six Aleve, had a shot of vodka, took a hot shower, & my dear, sweet, loving hubby rubbed my whole back with Tiger’s Balm.  Then I simply lay down on the couch with my family & vowed: I will get better, no matter what it takes!!  This is not the life I want, or the life my family deserves!   I will change my life!!