Well, I definitely feel better today! (Sunday) Even though I slept late this morning, when I got up I could stand & stretch! I’m still pretty stiff in the low back/pelvis but SOOO much better. I stretched for a few minutes & I was ready to go.

I was able to do almost three hours of work around the house & garden, being careful not to over-work my back (a past pattern of mine).  Around lunchtime I did have another ‘I’m so tired I’m passing out’ episode & I took a 2-1/2 hour nap,  but then I was up again & felt ready to go do more!  This is definitely progress.

I think the biggest change I’ve noticed over the past few days is that I’ve been hardly drinking any coffee or tea!  (Those of you who know me can pick your jaws up off the floor now.)  I’m usually the gal with a big mug in my hand most of the day–it’s the only way I’ve been able to keep myself on my feet & reasonably clear-headed.  But now I feel a more natural, ‘calmer’ sort of energy, if that makes any sense.  Today I never drank even one cup of green tea and I didn’t  notice until dinnertime!  This is amazing! I’m not having physical cravings for carbs either, just more of a  reflex kind.  I trimmed the the crusts off my son’s sandwich & almost ate them–but instead our dog Jay Jay performed the time honored role of clean up crew.  Whew!

I’ve had so many changes going on with my body over the past week it’s been hard to take time to post an update!!  (Or to sit for very long–my lower back has had me in knots at times.  Fortunately I feel much better now!)  So, where to begin?  I’ve had a very busy six days at Renew Integrative Health Center . . .

First, I had recommendations last week from Jonathon Dodds, L.Ac on eating lots of red foods to boost my intake of fresh antioxidants and other natural nutritional factors, along with changing my iron supplement.  I immediately did both that afternoon and this week I’ve already felt some difference in my energy level and was able to reduce both the allergy and antacid medications I’m taking. Yay!!  Thanks Jonathan!

I also had a meeting last Saturday with Tina Mears, MFT on the obstacles standing in my way of meeting my goals & how to overcome them.  She helped me strengthen my resolve to put time for myself at the top of my daily to-do list. As a wife, mother, educator, and back-up for my husband’s business I end up at the bottom of my list unless I hold my ground and insist on time to do my exercises & prepare healthy meals (sometimes two–one for me & one for them), as well as time for my various treatments at Renew.  I had already begun to carve time for myself but Tina really reinforced how necessary this is for my health–and the health of my family.

Then on Monday and Tuesday I attended two seminars at Renew: One given by Dr. Kamyar M. Hedayat, M.D. on the biological (endocrine) interactions between my mood, the foods I eat, and how these profoundly effect my overall health; The other, given by  Dr. Robert Buchel, D.C. was on the importance of ridding my body of accumulated toxins from my years of over-the-counter pain medications (which I take in high doses), various prescription drugs, and (like Dr. Hedayat’s lecture) the constant cravings for sugar and simple carbs (read: pastry, cakes, bread, chocolate).

These seminars really helped me understand the chains of  biological reactions that are happening within my body and gave me tremendous encouragement! Now I understand why I’ve been feeling such profound exhaustion, light-headedness, fuzzy thinking, and muscle/joint pain.  But even more importantly, this knowledge has expanded my understanding of the interactions between my liver, pancreas, gall bladder, digestive system, brain/mood, hormonal/chemical reactions that drive and serve these structures & their individual processes, & much more.   And this knowledge is extremely helpful in my understanding the approach of the doctors here at Renew.   (I guess I need to understand the scientific basis for everything–even treatments like acupuncture have scientific language that can be accurately applied.)

So, I began my physical therapy Wednesday with Dr. Vanessa Jackson, D.P.T and Adam in the PT suite & boy, did they get my body moving!  Not to say I was running & sweating–they were working hard to unlock my stiff muscles & joints, work on my posture, & go through a stretching & limbering routine for me to do daily at home.  I’m sure glad they have this awesome whirlpool table (trough-shaped table filled with a warm ‘waterbed’ that has whirlpool jets pulsing underneath)–aahh!  Pure heaven for the stiff body!  All this helped me tremendously.

Wednesday I also had my second chiropractic adjustment with Dr. Buchel and he really worked, adjusting my joints from the base of my skull all the way down to my feet!  My spine, shoulders, elbows, wrists, hands, pelvis, hips, knees, & ankles were checked & adjusted if needed.  Now I was walking much better, although my body wasn’t quite sure what to do!  I actually had to be conscious of my movements as my normal pattern of walking had changed & if I wasn’t careful I felt I might stagger sideways.  Fortunately, my body acclimated quickly & the awkwardness passed in a few minutes.

Finally on Wednesday, I had a full history & examination with Dr. Hedayat. When finished I was so gratified & relieved when he explained that many of the destructive cycles he had spoken of (in his seminar on Monday) were ongoing in my body & causing much of my ill-health.  After being told my HMO they couldn’t find what was wrong with me & I would ‘just have to live with it’, I was excited to have an actual diagnosis & to start a course of action to begin healing!  The most important thing Dr. Hedayat told me was I need to rest my liver, gall bladder, & pancreas right now.

So for the next month or so I will avoid all starchy carbs like pastry, bread, potatoes, rice, pasta, & sugar.  (Waa!  Bye-bye chocolate!)  Along with the dietary changes recommended by Jonathan & a few detoxifying supplements, I will eat animal protein with each meal, have lots of vegetables, & before I eat any fruit I will eat 3-4 almonds or walnuts to aid the digestive process.  I will also snack on whole eggs (I like hard-boiled) & of course, drink plenty of water.  I will miss my bread & rice especially but I can do this for a month, or even two if needed.  I understand why I need to do this so I’m not seriously tempted cheat. (But I’ll be glad when I can have some Arroz con Pollo or fresh, whole-grain bread again!)

Then on Thursday I was able to get up in the morning and actually stand up straight & walk without shuffling about!  I look in the mirrior–GASP! My shoulders are back, my pelvis tilted correctly–I look like I just lost 10 pounds overnight!  Thanks Dr. Vanessa, Adam, & Dr. B!!

I’m so grateful–and motivated!!  I’ve never before had all these issues brought together by one person, or group of people working together. Now, having concrete knowledge and a plan for action is the key to my new-found determination.  Before, I was always aware that each practitioner was separate and many times their individual recommendations were incompatible in varying degrees.  The lack of coordination between each modality left me with many doubts.  I would have difficulty trying to pick and choose what parts of which programs to do, and my guesswork was never very useful or satisfying.  Now I have a terrific group of people who are extremely well-trained, have a wealth of experience in their fields, and truly want me to succeed.  Their good humor & grace has already shone through & I know they will be of tremendous help when I hit those stumbling blocks, as surely I will.

Unfortunately, on Thursday I was exhausted all day after my action-packed Wednesday (including 1-1/2 hour traffic each way!).  Then, as I was feeling better, I  had some sort of stomach/digestive crisis that night.  Whether it was food poisoning, a 6 hour flu, or the grocery store rotisserie chicken was too greasy, I don’t know.  But I ended up on the floor for 3-4 hours with pains in my right side like I’ve never felt before.  After ridding myself of that which offended my body, the pain slowly subsided & I was finally able to go to bed about 3 am.

Friday I had to cancel teaching workshops after being up all night but I finally felt well enough to head down to Renew again where Jonathan gave me acupuncture which really helped soothe & calm the last feelings of pain & nausea.  Then Dr. Buchel gave me another comprehensive chiropractic adjustment after a soothing heat treatment.  Then, some gentle stretching on the traction table & I felt pretty good!  (I did cancel my Physical Therapy session though.)  But I headed over to The Broken Yolk & had a terrific 4-egg omelet with tons of veggies & herbal tea (no honey!).  I did look wistfully at the yummy blueberry muffin, but I was good & took it home for my son.  Then I came home & slept like the proverbial log all afternoon, night,  & late this morning (Saturday, I’m just up really late–yikes! It’s 12:59 am on Sunday morning!)

But I do feel much better today.  My muscles are a bit sore but nothing major.  My right side is still tender inside, but I’m fine with eating from my approved list.  I’m standing straighter & I did some stretches; tomorrow I’ll do my full PT routine of assigned stretches & limbering exercises.   Boy, it feels great to start feeling good again!!  Thanks everyone at Renew!

Well, the more I blog the more I’m realizing how I’m going to have to get back to a very firm grasp on my time management.  There’s no way I’m going to be able to make the changes I have to if  I can’t seem to figure out what it my problem is!  What’s up with me anyway?!   I’ve run my own profitable business from age 14, successfully attended college & university, had numerous jobs where I’ve worked very  & traveled solo more than half the year while completing my various duties, & I’ve been assigned many times to design or streamline department procedures.  Then WHY oh why is it so hard for me to juggle my life now?! The wife & mom thing has such an emotional component for me that I seem to not consider my own needs during my waking hours.  (That’s so hard for me to type, & to face–I feel like such a wimp!  But if I’m not truly honest with myself there’s no way I can make true changes in my life.)

And yes, I really do believe that making changes in your life starts with an awareness of the thing(s) you want to change.  Then you have to work very hard putting the change(s) you want to see in yourself into practice. Personally, I find it can be very helpful to understand why I do some of the things I do as it can help weaken my desire to do the thing I want to stop.  But the hardest part for all of us in making changes in our lives is to actually put the new behaviors or attitudes into constant practice! And we have to keep on doing them until they become second nature and actually become part of us!  (Oh, if it was only as easy to do as it is to write.)

Today (I’m writing late Friday night)  I feel like I do much of my time–as though I’m always exhausted, hiking up a hill with the top just a short distance ahead on the trail & all I have to do is to keep putting one foot in front of the other until I reach it–then everything will get easier.  As soon as I finish  <<insert chore/job description here>>,  then I’ll have time to spend on myself & exercise & address my health.  Then I’ll have time again to read books for pleasure, watch a movie or a few TV shows of my own, or to ride horses.  Then I’ll have time to do anything else I’d like to do because I have leisure time.  (Oooo, it sounds so decadent & sensual when I say it–leisure time.  The last time I had any was when I was pregnant, & before that almost 20 years ago!)

I guess that’s the big thing I’ll be so grateful for when our business is generating more income because I see money as something that can help to ease some of the stresses we have in life–it can buy leisure time.  Right now, lack of spendable income is a major motivator for so much of what hubby & I do–we do whatever ‘it’ is ourselves to save money.  I believe that’s basically a good thing but we’ve had to carry it to extremes for way to long.  I mean, I’d dearly love to have someone help me with the heavy cleaning  again, or assist me in re-organizing the garage, my office, & homeschool supplies.  I just become so physically exhausted when doing the same stuff millions of other people seem to do with no problem, that it’s  very discouraging to me.

Well I just went back & read what I wrote–Yikes!!   I’m not trying to be a downer (or whiner!) but I feel I’ve succeeded admirably.     I guess I’ve just felt like the mountain of work around here is endless!  I got that cold last Friday & went to sleep, then woke up & it was Tuesday!!  Poor hubby’s working such long hours he drags himself home, has a shower & dinner, then hits the sack.  He’s been great vacuuming & mowing the lawns for me though, even when he’s so whacked he’s walking around in a stupor as he knows how those chores really kill my back.  And like every mom, I had to plow through mountains of cleaning, dishes, grocery shopping,  & laundry while sick (& before myhome was ready for my friends & I to teach classes here this morning).   And now I have to be up at 6:00 am again, even though it’s almost midnight now.  Boy!!  Am I ever ready for a shower & beddie-bye!  For a week!!!

Now hold on a minute!  Now I’m going to stop this & focus on the positive things I’ve been doing!!  (Notice the behavior you want to change, then make the change.) I am proud of myself that I’ve been stretching every morning when I get up, & this definitely helps my mobility.  Instead of shuffling about for 10-15 minutes it’s only about 5 or so that it’s really bad.

And, since I found out I’d been chosen to participate in Ch10′s  Half-Year Challenge, I’ve really motivated to eat even healthier than usual!!  Don’t get me wrong, I still grab a salad or grilled chicken sandwich at the local drive-through with my 8 year old son, but I do eat 1-5 pieces of fruit per day, lots of veggies, whole-grain/ sprouted wheat  bread & bagels, lots of rice, beans & lentils, much more chicken & fish & little red meat (although I  love BBQ & carne asada), I drink lotsof water every day, & about 1-3 glasses of wine or beer a week.  Usually when I feel so bad physically, I over-indulge in chocolate (isn’t that one of the four major food groups?) and pastries.  Not now though!  I still have a few bites of chocolate or pastry, but I’m not eating gobs of this to give me the energy I need to get though the day like I was before.  Now when I get that totally exhausted, light-headed feeling & begin to get dizzy & have difficulty staying awake I have a small glass of juice, followed by a balanced mix of protein & ‘healthy’ carbs (whole grain, low-glycemic), then some coffee & an apple for dessert.  I’ve always felt better when I eat foods that minimize swings in blood sugar, even though I’ve never tested positive for any sort of diabetic- or pre-diabetic condition.  So I will be proud of myself for choosing to eat what is good for me & for actually being comfortable with the reduction of my emotional comfort foods.  Making good choices in my life feels good!

So I’ll pat myself on the back for choosing not to dwell on my sense of futility & to focus instead on my sense of optimism about my future health, & for my small steps toward my healthier self. I’ll keep remembering that I must cut my goals into manageable pieces, & even smaller pieces if I need to, but the important thing is to take those first baby steps & keep on going.

And I’ll remind myself that as my cold goes away I’ll get a better attitude back.  It’s so hard to feel like I’m ready to get up & go when all I want to do is to lay down & sleep!