Ohmigosh!  I sat down to write today thinking it was only 4 or 5 days since my last yak-yak and I did a double-take–where has the time gone this week!?!

I didn’t think I did that much this last week  <eye-roll>  but I do remember that I:

—–Finished my lesson plans, gathered materials, & began teaching my fall classes ( Math & Science) at our charter school, Greater San Diego Academy (GSDA).

—–Did our homeschool lessons each day (yes, I teach at home too!).    ;-D

—–Setup & coordinated the field trip & drove a carpool to Pasedena on Wednesday for an Aerospace & Science out-reach day for the kids  put on by all the industry heavyweights (NASA, JPL, Boeing, Northrup-Grumman, Wyle, NTSB, etc) to show how fun & rewarding a career in science, technology & engineering can be. They also had loads of  fantastic stuff for the educators. (ME: Puh-leeze can I have one of those cool NASA astronaut pens to go with all the great teaching materials you just gave me?!)   What a fantastic time but thoroughly exhausting!.

—–Coordinated our LEGO Engineering class, materials, & lessons at GSDA.

—–Had bad sciatica at the beginning of the week & drove to Renew on Monday & Tuesday for help, along with my regular Thursday session.

—–Put in solid exercise sessions each day for fitness, & to help my sciatica & lower back pain.

—–Toted my son to his sports group, archery lesson, did housework, ran errands,  blah, blah, blah, just like every other busy parent.

And now I’m in the middle of cooking dinner & arranging a last-minute trip to see my elderly grandmother in Seattle next month!  I guess I’d better sign off so I can finish making all the phone calls to various relatives before it gets too late but before that . . .

I want to report that I was able to do all these things this week & still feel pretty good because I’ve really been following my directives from all my health providers! I’m packing nutritious snacks & lunches (with the accompanying supplements to take at the appropriate times of the day).  I’m having to fight my family’s & my own tendencies to be up late but I’m adamant about my bedtime, & so I have been getting enough sleep.  I’m cooking meals, even when I don’t have the the time!  I’m really trying to listen to my body & when I begin to feel tired I’m having a snack & a rest.  And I’m taking time each day to just chill, whether it’s visiting with a friend while our kids are doing archery or taking half an hour to sit & read or practice my new guitar.

Most importantly, I’m sticking to the priorities I’ve set as to how I will spend my energy each day & I’m refusing to let guilt from myself or from other sources push me to try do everything at once. (I refuse to stay up past midnight like I did in the past)!   I’m not Suzy Homemaker or Super-Woman! There, I said it!

I’ve been trying to make a conscious decision each week as to which days I’ll work on the house & what are my priorities each day.  So this week I deliberately decided to let all but the essential housekeeping wait until Saturday, so it’s been kinda messy around here this week.  But it’s not disgusting or life-threatening, & where I used to beat myself up I now remind myself that my priorities are my health, my family, my educational responsibilities, & having some time to see friends & relax.  Having a picture-perfect home would be nice but it’s not at the top of my priority list.  (Honey, when can we afford some maintenance help?  ha ha)

So I’ll just keep on track with my health strategy & begin to enjoy my life & my family again & if I get busted by the White Glove Squad, they’ll have to leave my demerits on the front door knob ’cause I’ll either be workin’ out,  outta here, or sittin’ on the back porch watching the hummingbirds while I’m eating a healthy lunch & sippin’ a tall (decaf) iced tea!

P.S. Oh, I forgot to add that I verified that my home scale is the same as the medical scale at Renew, so I had a very pleasant surprise last week when I weighed myself & realized that from the beginning of my challenge I’ve shed 15 pounds!  (I knew my clothes fit differently . . . )

I’ve had energy all week!! AMAZING!! I feel pretty darn good & even have been waking in the morning feeling happy & reasonably well-rested!  (I’m still having some trouble falling asleep, but not more than a couple of hours.)  This is just fantastic!! I do still get tired if I try to do too much without taking a real break, but if I’m conscious of how my body is feeling & respect that I can have a 20 or 30 minute break, & then continue with my day with no huge drop in energy.

Part of this new feeling of health, I believe, is I’m being very conscious of eating my prescribed meals & healthy snacks on more of a schedule–I think I was right in that I really can’t wait to eat until I get hungry because my energy level falls too low & I never really regain it that day.  So the ‘scheduling’ thing seems to be working pretty well.  (And I’ve lost almost 10 pounds!)

Dr. Hedayat ordered the blood panels for my Endobiogenic testing & I have a follow up appointment in 2 weeks so it will be interesting to see what the results show.  I’m very aware that my newly-found feelings of mental clarity, less muscle & joint pain, & greater energy are just beginning, & so are still quite fragile.  I will  have to be quite vigilant of my daily structure & actions–to continue to protect myself from myself –& not delude myself that I’m instantly better & can now go back to my old, destructive habits.  I’m in this for the long haul!!  I want to treat the root causes of my health issues, not merely trim a few symptoms here & there, so I’m very interested in what the test results will show & what my next steps are.

But I think the greatest impact my higher, more consistent energy level is having is on my physical therapy/pain relief conditioning. Now (2-3 days per week) I’m able to ride the stationary bike for 45 minutes, throw in some intense interval training (e.g., 30 seconds as fast as I can possibly go, then 45 seconds slow for rest, 30 sec on/45 sec off for 3  or 4 sets) & still not be dizzy when I finish!! (But of course I’m sweating like crazy!)  I’m finding it easier to do the core-strength building exercises & have begun to do some gentle yoga moves along with my prescribed exercises.  And I’m using some of those specific exercises as pain-relievers when my back hurts so I’m still not popping pain pills!! Sure I still hurt–sometimes quite a lot– but I’m working hard to retrain myself to use the exercises as my first-line of defense.  And you know what?  They’re helping me to have less pain in the long run!  < DUH!! >  I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to find exercises that really work!  (Or to learn to use them as ‘medicine’ instead of just part of physical conditioning.)

My biggest challenge this week has been really painful sciatica.  Dr. Buchel has been giving me really great chiropractic adjustments & Dr. Vanessa (& Dr. Kevin) have been doing lots of mobilization & mucle therapies on my hips & low back–including my favorite, the cold laser!–so between the adjustments & the soft-tissue thaerapies I’ve felt tremendous relief!  (I’m actually sitting here typing & only have a minimal amount of pain instead of it being torture, or not doing computer work at all!)   Dr. Vanessa even had me out this week waling around the block with these crazy walking poles (they’re sort of like cross-country ski poles) that totally kicked my butt, or should I say abs & core body!!  Then I got to ‘play’ (read: sweat!) on the Wii Fit doing soccer, cross-country skiing, hula-hooping (go ahead & laugh–I dare you to do it too!), & yoga.  Normally I would have taken a week to recover but I actually felt more of a normal tiredness & just slept for about 12-1/2 hours that night & felt a good energy in the morning!

I really feel like the co-ordination of the different therapies, diet, & medicines are beginning to show their synergistic effect. And Jonathon has been giving me awesome acupuncture sessions that not only help my sciatica, but even more importantly, have the effect of bringing everything together. No, that’s not a very good description.  More like, confirming the placement of and & ‘comforting’ the newly re-aligned parts of my body–physically, functionally, & mentally.  I feel like the acupuncture helps in re-integrating the disparate parts of my being that have been long divorced,  & in the reconnection of  normal function & communication. Or I can just say it makes me feel terriffic & leave it at that.   ;-D

Just a quick note before I head off to bed:

I’m feeling so much better this week!  My energy level has picked up a little each day, & Friday & today were great!  I’m riding my bike for 45 minutes now (still fairly low resistance) but I’ve started interval training & I’m still having just minimal dizziness after the aerobic work!!  Yay!!  The dizziness has been such a huge obstacle to working out that I hope it’s gone for good.

I’m also being very good & sticking to my cleansing diet, even when I get cravings for pastries, pasta, etc.  Today was my 51st birthday & I didn’t even have cake (although my friends did)–I had a lovely bowl of fresh fruits with my favorite gourmet vanilla yogurt on top, with a sprinkle of cinnamon & a handful of toasted pecans.  YUM!  I truly didn’t miss the cake (well, maybe only when I was smelling it while I cut & served it!).  I know how good I feel now, when I’m careful about what I eat, so I want to keep feeling good.  Cake & other yummy things will come back into my diet later, but not at this stage.

And, today several friends noticed I no longer have those huge black circles under my eyes I’ve had for years! I still have some darkness in the corners but they’ve faded to less than half what they were & the rest of the circles are completely gone.  Folks also noticed that my skin color was very healthy looking, not strained & sickly-looking, & that I had  much more energy!  I guess I’m not the only one noticing the positive changes I’m going through now, & it feels good.

I’ll write more tomorrow but now it’s time for me to stick to my bedtime schedule (it’s becoming very important for me to go to bed when I feel tired & not push myself to stay awake).

Now I think I’ll just go to sleep & dream of my next 50 years;  feeling good, regaining my health, & of all the adventures that await me!!

Yes!!  I’m so happy!

Friday at Renew I had my Physical Therapy & chiropractic, then Jonathon gave me an awesome acupuncture session, after I told of my sciatica & on-going insomnia.  (Not only have I been having trouble falling asleep but when I finally do, I sleep very lightly, not deep enough for REM sleep where we do our dreaming.)   Well, not only did I fall sound asleep on the acupuncture table & start dreaming right then, I had the most wonderful night’s sleep that night!    I just got into bed & fell asleep right away, & I dreamt all night, non-stop. It was like an 12 hour movie marathon in there!  (I’m making up for lost time?)  I felt sooo good when I woke up, very happy & rested.

In fact it felt so comfy & good I decided to take a short nap Saturday afternoon just so I could have more, blissful sleep &  then fell right to sleep again Saturday night!  Oh, I thank you for that Jonathon!

Dr. Kevin sure worked me over in PT on Friday though.  My sciatica is slowly getting better but the muscles across my hips, rump, & outer thighs are still very tight (even causing some bones to be pulled out of alignment, especially my SI joint).   So I had another ‘tenderizing’ session–ooch!  But afterwords I really felt better, even though I was pretty stiff until I stretched & worked out Saturday.  I’m sure glad he’s working the cramps & muscle adhesions out as the sciatica is very painful & really limits what I can do.  (I’m limited to about 10 minutes of sitting or standing, & can lie down only on one side.)  So I can actually say I’m so happy that Dr. Kevin really kicked my butt!

In fact I felt soooo much better between Dr. Buchel’s chiro adjustment, the acupuncture, PT, & a good night’s sleep that I was able to do more on the bike Saturday (40 minutes!!) & do almost all of my exercises!  Boy, it’s amazing what you can do when you’re without much pain, & with a good night’s sleep!

Today I was only a little tired, but the heat sure took everything I had.  Our son had his Cub Scout ‘Box-Car’ Derby & picnic today & even under the shade pavilions it was HOT!!  So I’ve rested most of the afternoon & I’m trying to convince myself that I can get up & do some stretches & light exercise.  I think I’ll go make a power smoothie & do my exercises half an hour after I finish it–that usually helps!

I don’t know what’s been up with me the last 3 or 4 days but all of a sudden I’m craving sugar & caffeine.  It’s very strange.  I’ve been on the modified low-carb/no sugar diet (see post, ‘New Habits”) for almost 4 weeks now & I haven’t really had much cravings, & when I did they were very mild.  But now?! Yikes!!

I totally want a really good cup of espresso & some kind of rich dessert–New York-style cheesecake, any kind of french pastry, my grandpa’s homemade cinnamon rolls with walnuts & raisens!  Or a nice strong cup of Earl Grey or Irish Breakfast tea, sweetened with a bit of honey & a plate of scrumptious, British scones. < *Sigh* >

I know the foods I eat have a direct effect on my mood & my body’s health, so I’m definitely not indulging.  But man, it’s soooo hard to follow my head & not my tastebuds!!!

Instead, my son & I split an apple’s worth of slices dipped in  organic, roasted peanut butter,  & I had a strong cup of Kava tea.  (I’m hoping the tea will help with my insomnia, which returned at the same time the cravings started.  Hmmmm . .) Definitely not as drool-worthy as all of the above, but passable.  So, now I’m off to hit the showers, & (hopefully) have a good snooze tonight.

Well, I’m happy to report I’ve had more energy yesterday & today!  I’ve been religious about eating a healthy snack within the first ten minutes I wake up, & that has helped a lot. I must need instant refueling after no food all night because if I don’t snack ASAP I start getting fuzzy-headed & I never really get to full power all day.   Hmmm . . . I wonder what this means?  (Good thing I’ll speak with Dr. Hedayat on Friday.)

Also, I’m still having sciatica, but thankfully not as bad as last week (I could barely walk!).  Every time it begins to flare up I do some of the exercises & stretches that Dr. Vanessa & Dr. Kevin have given me.  I’m very determined to use OTC pain meds only when I must, so I’m referring to my exercise printouts constantly.  I’m finding which ones work best for different kinds of pain, so I should be able to just stop & do whatever I need pretty soon as I’ll have memorized them all!

I’ve read some articles about how certain types of yoga can be very beneficial for fibromyalgia patients so I may try going into some of the basic moves I’m familiar with very slowly to see how my body tolerates them. (But I guess I should probably check with Dr. Vanessa first.)   ;-D

Yesterday I was able to ride my stationary bike (with low resistance) for 30 minutes, so I feel very good about that.  I was pretty tired physically today but not so bad that it interfered with my day–now that’s progress!  Yay! I’ve had to set my timer, but I’ve been eating either a healthy meal or snack about every 2 hours–it’s the only thing that keeps my brain engaged & energy up.

Now to make more progress at night.  For some reason I’ve been having insomnia again. (Pain? Worry? So tired I can’t sleep?  All of the above?  Again, something to speak with Dr. Hedayat about.)   So now I’m off to take a relaxing shower while I sip my Sleepytime tea & do boring-type crosswords until I can’t keep my eyes open. Rah.  :-D

Finally!!  I’m getting my energy back!  I woke up this morning & actually popped out of bed within 1/2-hour, not the 3+ hours of grogginess I’ve been going through before I can drag myself out.

But really, I’ve felt like this week would never end. I can’t believe it’s taken me TWO weeks to recover from that intense cleaning/house arranging marathon!  I hate being this fragile.  But I guess it really shows how run-down I was because even though I’m feeling better than before I began my health journey, I must be mindful that I still have a long way to go to be ‘sturdy’ again.   (Must . . .  pace . . . self . .  . . . . . . . have . . . patience . . . . . . Gah!)

This last week I had extreme sciatica to boot so walking has been full of surprises–I’ll be fine one moment, then I’ll stand for 5 minutes & can barely hobble across the kitchen.  Dr. Vanessa is on vacation so Dr. Kevin & Adam really helped put me back together.  Lots of stretching, plus Adam really worked over all my seized up muscles.  I felt so much better!  (And when I got home I was even better after a hot shower & Tiger’s Balm!)  I guess some of my sleepiness has been due to the pain–it totally wipes me out.

But  today I’m feeling pretty darn good, which is very encouraging.  (Yes!  I need encouraging right now!)  I’ve been very careful to stop, have a healthy snack, & rest whenever I start feeling tired so I’ve been able to go pretty much all day.  Not a lot of heavy work mind you, but the everyday chores I’ve had a hard time tackling.  So, yay me!!

My hubby, MIL (Mother-in-law), & son are coming home tonight from their week-long vacation, so I guess my vacation ends tonight too.    ;-D    Guess I’d better pull my garlic-roasted chicken off the rotisserie, grab my mega-salad & curl up with the DVR before they get home!

Yikes!  All I have to report is: sleeping! Since my last post I’ve managed to sleep through most of each day, especially since I’ve sent my hubby & son on a week-long vacation in the Eastern Sierras.   AAAH, the bliss of a quiet house!  I can sleep as much as I need!  (I guess I must need quite a lot right now as I’m still recovering from all the major stress & over-work last week.)

Today I actually got up before 10:00 (not after 1pm!) & was ready to tackle some over-due paperwork so I worked at the computer this morning & only took a 2 hour nap (not 4+!).  Now it’s time to hit the sack as I do have a long day tomorrow.  Good thing I’ve almost recharged my batteries, I’m going to need it!

Later, . . .  my pillow . . . is  . . . calling . . . < * snore * >

I was so excited to be making progress on Friday (previous post) & then (duh-duh-DUH) I really overworked Saturday, Sunday, & Tuesday—what a mistake! My hubby,  mom,  MIL (mother-in-law) & Uncle-in-Law all came up & we worked to finish off the upstairs ‘renovaton,’ cleanup, & do major reorganization of the 4 upstairs bedrooms.  (Talk about an exhausting game of musical furniture!   Whew! )  It does feel good to finish this seemingly never-ending project but man, I’m still whipped!  Even though I tried so hard to pace myself I had folks calling me all day long from all over the house for help, direction, decisions, blah, blah, blah.

Bottom line:  Now I’ve gone back to the extreme exhaustion, dizziness spells, & muscle fatigue.  I’ve barely had enough energy to follow my food plan (it would be soooo much easier to make an organic PB&J instead of cooking &/or slicing & dicing) but I’m being good, even though it’s very tempting to go back to my old stop-gaps.    And I know that I have to fight myself to take it easy when I’m  recovering! How could I have thought I was being careful?  What was I thinking?? (My pattern has been:  I begin to feel good then–bam!  I don’t have the patience to wait for the real recovery to be complete so I plunge forward, then end up back at square one, or worse.)   This time though, I simply felt guilty that everyone else was working so hard & I thought I looked like a slug whenever I put my feet up for a five or ten minutes.  I really try hard not to let what others think of me drive my behavior, but after a while the big sighs & eye-rolling made it hard to be firm with myself & rest.

Anyway, I am feeling better after lots of rest yesterday & today & I’m looking forward to my appointments tomorrow at Renew Health.  I’m seeing everyone tomorrow, except Tina Mears, so it’ll be a long morning but I know I’ll feel better when I’m done–I always do!

I did feel much better on Monday after Dr. Vanessa worked me over (she even used this new cold laser I’d never seen before to help breakup old adhesions in my muscles & reduce pain).  I did have to really take it easy during my workout though as I felt, literally, like I was an empty shell.  (I did finally get to meet Crystal though!  I knew she’s at Renew also but we’d never connected until then.  She’s so nice & she’s really working hard–just watching her workout kicked my be-hind!)  ;-D

After my body work with Dr. Vanessa & workout with Adam in PT, Dr. Buchel gave another awsome chiropractic adjustment, then I was back to see Dr. Vanessa to get more kiniseo-tape to help put me back together.  I did feel much better after I left on Monday, & I did rest when I got home, but I didn’t rest enough & then it was back to work on Tuesday to finish the house.  Stupid, stupid, stupid!

Hmmm, let’s see, what have I learned?  Anything???  (Darn, I sure hope so!)

First:  Don’t let others’ expectations, or my presumption of their expectations, goad me into behaviors that I know are unhealthy for me at the time.  I am strong enough in my resolve to guard my health & if some folks don’t understand my situation then I’ll just have to live with their diminished opinion of me.

Second:  I have to watch myself more closely than I thought as I continue to recover my health. I’ve been advised in the past to look at what I think I should be able to do at each stage of physical recovery (after knee surgery, etc) & cut that expectation in half.  Then, cut it in half again.  I guess I’ll have to go back to this mindset when I’m tempted to ‘break out’ on the days when I’m feeling really good.  Even though boring, I know that slow & steady is my best plan for now.  Rats!  ;-D

A short post tonight (amazing, I know!).    I’m pooped, but it’s still good.   Usually on Fridays I’ve been so exhausted after teaching Science class in the morning (at my house) that when the students finally go home about 12:45 all I can think about is lunch & a very long nap.  And then I’ll take a 2-4 hour nap!  (After 12-14 hours of sleep!)

Last Friday was better & I only napped about 1-1/2 hours, but today I’m excited that I only took a catnap while watching my son & his friends–for about 45 minutes! I could hear them playing Zoo Tycoon: The Complete Collection on the computer & it was fun listening to my little 8yr old zookeeper explain how important it is to keep the animals happy & how you go about that monumental task.   I really enjoyed putting my feet up in the recliner & not having to move for a while, as well as feeling well enough that I didn’t immediately pass out & miss the fun.

I was doubly surprised since I took the kids to the pool after classes this morning & we played there for about 2 hours, then came home.  So even though I’m thoroughly whipped, I don’t feel that fatigue that would just suck me down until I’d literally fall on the couch or bed & sleep for hours.

My life is coming back to me now, slowly but surely.  (Yes!  I said surely!!  I need all the pep talks I can get–even from myself!)   ;-D