Well, I made it through today–Yay!          Yesterday I was really dragging & had such a difficult time with fatigue & joint pain, & then a head cold on top of it all.  But today I was able to get up at 4:30, finish preparing to teach workshops at my home this morning, & then GO SWIMMING!!   Oh man, did that feel good!!

I was actually very tired after classes today but a nice lunch at the kitchen table with a dear friend really helped me recharge. I ended taking her son & mine to the pool so they could test my son’s ‘boat’ he & hubby built (out of an old (clean) cooler, 2×4 ‘outriggers’, & pool noodle /  juice jug pontoons–hee hee!).  While the two of them had a blast paddling about & cavorting like seals, I slowly warmed up my joints & stretched & stretched & stretched.  Then I was able to do do some swimming, play games diving for the boat plug (a large bolt), & swim a few laps doing the crawl.

I swam about simply enjoying myself when it suddenly hit me: I haven’t been in the pool for over a year! As I sat in the hot tub after my swim I asked myself, Why have I kept making excuses not to get in the water? (Excluding the times when the pool &/or weather’s just too darn cold, or I just feel too darn fat!)  My logical mind tells me to do just what I did today: Get in, warm up & move, but not so much as to make myself overly sore or stiff.  Or, just get in the hot tub, darnit, & loosen up my joints & muscles that way!  But I’ve been so physically & emotionally exhausted from the stresses of our start-up business, trying to keep grown-up worries from pressing down on our 8 year old son, & all the everyday financial & personal anxieties so many of us are facing right now that I kept saying to myself, Later.  I’ll do it tomorrow.  I know I have to get back into shape to reduce my back pain, but I just don’t have a enough energy right now to blow out a candle, let alone go for a swim.  Tomorrow.  I’ll do it tomorrow.

I feel bad because my poor hubby has been begging my to take walks with him & my son keeps saying he wants to  “Spend some fun time with you Mom, not just sit around the house with you, or when you’re teaching classes!”   They both want to get up & go with me but my feet, ankles, knees, hips & back all hurt so much I can only be on my feet for 15 or 20 minutes max before I have such severe pain I have to sit & rest/nap.  I think I need some kind of arch supports &/or walking shoes but I’ve put that off too.  Not only do I feel guilty spending money but I just don’t have the energy most days.   (Boy, it’s easy to fall into the trap of feeling exhausted & powerless.)

But, (I remind myself) swimming is an excellent start!!  It’s low-impact & aerobic so I’m resolved to feel good about what I accomplished today–not to dwell on how far I still need to go.  I don’t remember who said this but my hubby is always telling me, “The only way to eat an  elephant is one bite at a time!” Disgusting metaphor, I know, but still very wise.

So, I will pat myself on the back for not falling into my habit of sitting on the sidelines. I will replay many times in my mind how good I felt in the water, how relaxing just swimming some gentle strokes felt to my mind & body, & how totally peaceful and zen-like it felt to simply float in the hot tub.  I feel so happy & relaxed now–a feeling & haven’t felt in much, MUCH too long a time!   

LATE UPDATE!  I got my 1st email from Renew Integrative Health & they will be scheduling my 1st meeting with them for next week–I can’t wait to get their perspective on what’s up with me!

Now, hubby & DS (dear son) have gone for a long bike ride so I’m taking a nice shower & hitting the hay.   Ah, a quiet house–bliss!!

Hi, I’m Dawn! If you’ve checked out my Bio you know I’m a busy mom & wife who is struggling with stress, & pain from fibromyalgia & old back & knee injuries. I’m used to being physically active & having lots of energy so this is quite difficult for me. Between teaching science & math workshops, homeschooling our 8 year old son, helping my hubby with his start-up engineering business, & all the day-to-day, time-consuming tasks that go with runnning a household, I’ve got plenty to keep me running!  I really struggle to get through the day much of the time so I’m SO  ready to work hard & get my life back!!

Yesterday morning I had a great meeting with Trudi, Patti, & David at Ch 10, & even got to meet fellow contestant Connie!  (She’s such a crack-up!)   What a great bunch of people–I can tell that working with them over the next six months is going to make this experience a lot of fun (to go along with all the hard work).  My meeting today really brought it home to me all the support I have behind me–what a gift this Challenge is for me right now!  I still can’t believe I’m a part of this & I’m grateful for the chance not only to make these essential changes in my life, but to share my journey with others who may face similar challenges. I’ve been antsy to have my 1st meeting with my sponsor, Renew Integrative Health Center, & now  Ijust can’t wait to get going on my plan of action!

Yesterday was a full day for me (5 am to 10 pm) starting with my meeting in the morning & by the time I got home & everyone was in bed I was completely wiped out.   :-P     So, no blogging yesterday, even though mentally I was super-energized & ready to get started.  Then today I had another one of my ‘bad’ mornings & couldn’t wake up (I’m not sure, but I think this is part of the fibromyalgia) & I slept intil 12:15!  The cold I’ve been fighting decided to settle in too while I prepared to teach workshops tomorrow out of my home. (I’m teaching science over the summer & two friends are teaching music & Spanish, so I have a full house here for 3+ hours on Fridays).  I’m so disgusted with myself!  Can’t I even have a long day without it totally knocking me on my butt??   :-(

I’m happy though that I did manage to get some quick thoughts down today, & I’ve been even more careful than usual to eat a healthy diet now that I’m part of the Challenge, so I do feel I’m making positive steps even if I’m not working out.  I figure that right now the most important things I can do until I work with Renew on mapping out my health strategy is to rest, eat well, stretch out, & above all, keep my ‘eye on the prize’–the prize being my health!!